Joshua's Courage: Journal 15

11-15-07

Leaving addictions behind...

I love World of Warcraft. I played for about four months of my life and it consumed who I was. I played with friends from seminary, college, and high school, and we rocked the world (the fake world we lived in!). I have nothing against the game, and I still love it, but WOW was not a good game for me. You see, I quickly became addicted, and it affected my time I spent with God, friends, lesson planning, reading, seminary work, etc.

I had to give up playing, not because it is a sin to play such games, but because for me playing WOW was a stumbling block for other areas of my life. From time to time, I still want to go back, but I know it will affect the little time I have to spend with my wife and do other important things. Sometimes it is so hard to leave things behind to become a better, more Christ-like, person.

There are other things I should leave behind, but don't really want to. What foods can I leave behind to be healthier, happier, and have a longer-life? What sarcastic phrases can I leave out to better honor those around me? You get the idea. If we all cut out things that, while not sinful in themselves, lead us away from a life that is just as fun, but fuller and richer!!!

Joshua's Courage: Journal 14

1-13-07

As I stood on the stage with Mr. Bray today, I could not help but feel like Maximus from Gladiator, with the spectators cheering my name as I closed in for the kill. I was filled with adrenaline and pride, for my school and myself. I loved every second of our Amazing Race filming today, but it was later I realized just how prideful I am and how humble Bray is.

I love attention. I love to be the center of attention and to hold sway over the minds and emotions of the audience. Being an actor, gladiator, teacher, etc. is not evil in itself. In fact, there is nothing wrong with enjoying the moment like I did this morning. My HEART, however, was not in the right place. What stands out even more to me as I think about that experience is how humble my "teammate is."

I never see Bray take credit for things he doesn't do. He has become a natural leader for our team in the time I have met him, yet he never claims credit for the ideas he has or leadership he takes. I, on the other hand, love to let people know when I create something. Give ME the glory!! It is my prayer that I would continue to follow examples of Christian humility and set my pride aside, so that I might enjoy amazing experiences even more!

Joshua's Courage: Journal 13

11-12-07

Lately I have been thinking about the will of God and the will of man. It seems so complex sometimes. How can God know everything that will happen, yet we have free choice in our life. It seems like we have two problems, one for each extreme. Either we believe God has absolute control and our decisions don't matter, or we have no faith in God's control so we are afraid our decisions will destroy our lives.

The comforting thing is that neither is extreme is the case. God has complete control, so we have no need to worry. We also have a say in our lives, so we can be a part of God's plan on our own accord. The best illustration I've come up with lately is the chessboard. God already has a plan to defeat the enemy that will NOT fail! At the same time, as one of the pieces, I can move multiple directions. In the end, where I move will not destroy the game. I may end up pulling a stupid move or I might be the decisive winning strike, but I get to play a part. God is so cool to allow me to participate in his great plan of redemption!

Joshua's Courage: Journal 12

11-11-07

Yesterday, Nicole and I attended a wedding in Windsor, Colorado. One of my best friends in the whole world got married. Lindsey and I have been friends since 7th Grade. She is one crazy girl and I wish we didn't live so far apart. Lindsey is highly involved with "Hippie Ministry." She attends the Rainbow Gathering every year, where she and several other Christians camp with a bunch of crazy stoners who sit around chanting happy things and drink, sing, dance, bake, smoke, etc. for about a month.

In many ways, Lindsey and I are polar opposites. I love ministering to sword toting computer nerds and she loves hemp wielding hippies. She would have a hard time with those I love to share God with and there is no way I would survive without attacking someone at the Rainbow Connection. God has given us separate passions, which is awesome.

Anyways, one of the most incredible things happened at Lindsey's wedding. At the very end of the ceremony, before "You may now kiss the bride," the pastor told us that Lindsey and her husband had never kissed on the lips while dating. I know some of you will roll your eyes as you read this, or think there is no way you could ever do that, but it was incredible to watch a couple who had made a commitment to stay pure to each other in a special way and keep it until their wedding day.

I am not advocating this for everyone; in fact, I don't think it is the "right" or "wrong" thing to do. Instead, I hope you will see this as something that most Christians fail to do. They set a standard for their lives and COURAGEOUSLY kept it in spite of societal pressure and what their hormones wanted. God was really honored in Lindsey's wedding, and I left feeling like I should strive to make commitments to God and stand courageously behind them. I hope you can do the same with decisions in your life.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 11

11-10-07

It is hard to live this life alone. In spite of the fact that my number one rule is "People are stupid," it is awfully hard to enjoy yourself without people. In fact, I would go as far as saying life would be near impossible without brothers and sisters in Christ to guide you and walk beside you on life's darkest roads. Most of you know I've been there, and I've told you I never would have survived alone. God has given us other people because he knows we can't do it on our own.

I was thinking about my courage when it comes to other people. I come across as ridiculously outgoing at school, but I'm really not. I hate meeting new groups of people; I am claustrophobic in large crowds. What is even worse, is that I don't really appreciate the friends I already have in my life. Two great examples of this are Mrs. Martin and Mr. Bray. These two have been incredible friends to me. I love them dearly, but I rarely pray for them or ask them how things are REALLY going.

Daniel Broas made a challenge I would like to emulate; I want to reach out to those around me and, whether it is awkward or not, let them know I love them. I need to be a true prayer warrior and live each moment as if it is the last, not just for me, but for those around me. You never know how long someone else is going to be in your life Don't waste that time. And to Ross and Sara: If you read this, you should know I care about you more deeply than I ever say; I treasure the friendships we have.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 10

11-8-07

Today I have been reflecting on my students. I love teaching; I absolutely love the subjects I teach, the people I teach with, and the school I teach at. I thank God for the gifts he has given me in the arena of teaching. My real passion, however, is my students. I care about them so much it hurts at times.

When I see some of the things they are dealing with on a daily basis, it tears me up: Cancer, Divorce, Death, Injury, Depression, and more things than I can fathom are beating up on their hearts and souls. I know I try hard to reach out to them and be a part of their lives, but I should be trying even harder. I pray that God would bless me with the strength and heart to really dig deep and be a support and life-changer, to battle right along with them as they fight. May I never give up on them and continue to pray daily for them.

Here are some pictures of my wonderful students this year:

1st Period:
3rd Period:

4th Period:

5th Period:

6th Period:

7th Period:

Joshua's Courage: Journal 9

11-7-07

I wrote this poem about 7 years ago. When I wrote it, I was thinking about how many of the little things I let let slide by as I race around my life busily. Today, I have been thinking about how precious time is. We waste SO much of it. I hope I can really stop and listen to God; that I can delight in the small blessings he gives me; that I appreciate each of my friends, students, and co-workers. Christ died for me to give me not only eternal life, but a life of purpose on this earth. I pray to God I don't waste it!

Do you ever get real mad?

Do you ever get real sad?

If you do, then you should know this,

Amongst the dandelions you’ll be glad.

When life’s troubles get you down,

When something makes you frown,

When you need a place to go,

Amongst the Dandelions you’ll be glad.

Just take your shoes off and run,

Through the grass, under the sun,

Bask in God’s amazing Glory,

Amongst the Dandelions you’ll be glad.

Just take a seat and you will find,

That there you can free your mind,

Take the time to just reflect,

Amongst the Dandelions you’ll be glad,

Then get a grin upon your face,

Because of God’s amazing grace,

Enjoy your life the way it is,

Amongst the Dandelions you’ll be glad.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 8

11-6-07

I talked to my students today about the cycle of sin we become trapped in as Christians. What annoys me so much about this illustration is: 1. We trap ourselves in these cycles. 2. Even though we "repent," we never actually end the cycle. And 3. Most of the time we don't think this cycle is going to end up causing too many problems for us. As I pondered these faults that we have, that I have, I determined that I should really view my sin as a downward spiral.

There are so many sins that seek to ensnare me as I walk with God. When I act courageous, I face the problem with God by my side (and in front and behind) watching and protecting me. Nothing can stand against my God. When I pretend like what I am facing is no big deal and I can face it on myself, I quickly begin on a downward spiral from which there is no return apart from God's intervention.

I pray that as I face difficult situations, I would remember where that spiral leads and put God first in everything I do. I will pray the same for you.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 7

11-5-07

Meet The Time Lord, The Doctor, and Ryan Wade. These three are all the same person, a wonderful young man from Saintfield, Northern Ireland. Ryan and I met two and a half years ago at Saintfield High School, where he introduced himself as The Time Lord. He was ridiculously hyper-active and crazier than me and all of my Freshmen put together.

I didn't get to know him much the first year, but last summer, we met again. He was still crazy, but as we did "youth group" events at the church in Saintfield, Ryan became more interested in God and the people who serve Him. He became attached to me and I became attached to him. We hung out and got to know each other on a level he had shared with no one else.

Eventually, he broke down his barriers and we talked about God. I have never felt so moved by the Holy Spirit as Ryan asked me questions and I presented the Gospel, not in the normal fashion, but in a way I knew his unique personality would grasp it. He left for the night without me knowing what to expect. The next day, because of God alone, he came back and told me he had prayed; he wanted to be a different person. I gave him my Bible and had the whole Ireland Team sign it. He was absolutely thrilled.

As we sat in class today watching the movie about Cam Duncan, I thought of Ryan. God gave me a moment of courage, an opportunity to share the Gospel and actually DO something I said I believed in. Because I trusted God I made an incredible new friend; a Christian brother in a foreign place. When I think of Ryan, I do not only think of my courage, but his too. The courage it took to go against his culture and stand up for what he believed in, instead of following all his friends. I miss the Time Lord, but someday soon we'll be together again.

My prayer for myself, my wife, my friends and my students this year is that we will live for the truth, like we actually believe what we say.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 6

11-4-07

As I write this tonight, I sit nervously at my keyboard. I am afraid of what God is doing in the hearts of my students. I trust His will completely, but I hate to see the struggles and internal conflicts each of them are dealing with as they tread the dark paths of life to find either hope or despair at the end of the tunnel. I pray it will be light, but I know some of them will not choose wisely.

Tomorrow, I will be showing them a documentary that changed my life. It has the potential to change theirs as God moves in their hearts. I pray it would give them something to think about and that I would be given strength to answer questions, make the first move, pray diligently, and be a godly example for the students I love so much.

I am worried they will think the story is boring or silly. I know I have to trust God. In the same way I shared my story of my life with Sarah and Nicole, I know they will be blessed by Cameron's story. Sometimes I think I love too much, because it hurts; ultimately, I know God gave me this passion and I pray I serve Him well.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 5

11-3-07

Learning to trust God can be very difficult. I have been working on my relationship with Him for many years, and it seems like I often end up at square one when it comes to trust. I will be doing great letting God have control in difficult and easy situations alike; then, out of nowhere, comes something I wasn't expecting and WHAM! I fail to courageously face my problem knowing that God will take care of me.

This happened yesterday. As you know, I attend New Geneva Theological Seminary. Last night, we had a big banquet to raise money and get prayer support for the seminary. I was asked to create a picture slideshow for the dinner, which is no big deal. In fact, I've done a lot of slideshows and really enjoy designing them, adding music, etc. This time, however, I was really stressed out working on it. It took me ten hours to make it, which I could have been using to do homework, grade tests, etc.

Not only did I stress out making the show, but when it came time to play it at the banquet, I was really nervous. I had poured my week into it, and it had to work in front of my professors, fellow students, and a lot of big donors. I should have trusted God and not even worried about it. Instead, I relied on my own strength to try and get through it. In the end, nothing went wrong and I received many compliments on the show.

Instead of feeling glad, I went home feeling like I should have just trusted God. I didn't enjoyt he banquet like I should have because of my fear. And so, as I move onward, I need to keep praying that I won't worry about anything, but trust in God who is much bigger than any of my problems could ever be!

Joshua's Courage: Journal 4

11-1-07

"Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens."
-Tolkien-


As I sat alone last night
I wondered in distress
About failing my Savior
My life felt a Mess

Sleeping was hopeless
But exhaustion was clear
So I called on the Lord
Out of hope and fear

I confessed all my sin
I prayed God would take
My life and my heart
And a warrior he'd make

Faithless no longer
Nor dark or alone
Alive and forgiven
My sins are atoned

May I fight the good fight
And die well for my King
Draw swords with my brothers
To God's truth I'll cling

-Tharp-

Joshua's Courage: Journal 3

10-31-07
Happy Reformation Day!

Velociraptors: If you are not sure what these are, check out the picture. These dinosaurs are some of the sweetest killing machines in history. They were quick, deadly, and stunningly good-looking; and, in case you haven't figured it out, these are my favorite creatures.

As I was pondering my journal topic today, I thought about the Velociraptor and came across a problem I face a lot: I like to try and face my problems alone. This is problematic, since life is not meant to be dealt with by yourself. In fact, whenever I try to face temptation, solve a problem, undertake a construction project, or go hiking, I have a hard time doing it by myself. This is not to say I am super-needy and cannot do anything alone. What I am saying is that we are meant to have help getting through life.

The Bible speaks all about accountability and teamwork. We are called to strengthen each other as "iron sharpens iron." "A cord of three strands is not easily broken." God has given us people in our lives to help us deal with our problems. We were not meant to be alone. Even Adam, living in a perfect creation, was given a partner to complete him.

How does this tie into Velociraptors? Velociraptors are a team. When they hunt, one of them distracts the prey while the others surround and go in for th kill. They communicate, look out for each other, and never give up. In fact, if the prey is too big, they wait for something else to kill it and then scavenge what they want. In many ways, I should be like a Velociraptor: The next time I am feel like I have to face my problem alone, I need to call up some help and move in for the kill.

Joshua's Courage: Journal 2

10-30-07
Tonight, while I was sitting on the couch at home, I heard my wife scream from behind me. I quickly turned my head to see her finger right next to my face with an enormous spider crawling towards me. Doing the manly thing, I screamed. Not only did I act cowardly with my voice, I also jumped out of my seat and backed up as fast as I could. I was terrified! It ended up being a fake spider, and about five minutes later my heart calmed down.

What does this have to do with facing my problems? The truth is that I try to scare my wife all the time. I think it is hilarious when I make her jump and scream. At the same time, I do not like being scared; I have double-standards. Tonight, after I recovered from the shock of being scared, I was irritated with Nicole. In my mind, I was thinking: "I thought something was really wrong when she screamed; how can she expect me to think it's funny when she makes me worry about her at the same time?" I was being irrational. I can think its funny to scare her, but how dare she scare me!

As I pondered this situation, I realized I need to be conscious of the standards I set, intentionally or not. I need to stand firm against my own selfishness and be able to take what I give out. Only then will I learn to understand the people I love in a deeper, more effective way. Being sensitive to others needs is important; it is just as important to be sensitive to the standards we set for others, sometimes without even realizing it.

Here is my pic of the day, showing the way I look after I get upset:

Joshua's Courage: Journal 1

Hello fellow readers!
I am creating this first series of posts as part of a Bible project I am having my Freshmen do for the book of Joshua. They will be creating a journal of some sort, chronicling their acts of courage or cowardice throughout the next three weeks. I have undertaken this project myself, telling them that if a teacher thinks an activity is life changing, he should be willing to do it himself! Here is my first entry:

10-29-07
As I gave this assignment out today, I wondered what on earth I would write about in my own journal. There are so many things to pick from as I reflect on my day: My thoughts, words, and actions have brought many forked-roads; it is at these places I must choose a path. Do I respond to conflict, stupidity, and other situations with cutting sarcasm and irritation, or do I take the road less traveled and act like I really believe what I teach?

For today's topic, I have decided to focus on one of my major Monday morning struggles: Complaining. It is easier for me to complain than it is for calculus student to add 2+2. Complaining comes natural to me. I would rather spout off for 30 minutes about how irritated I am to post grades or clean up the house than take the 10 minutes to do either. When it comes to situations of, as the Bible says, letting my actions match my words, I often fail miserably.

Thankfully, I have felt convicted lately to spend time praying about my problem. I know I won't instantaneously be Mr. Cheerful, but lately I have seen myself being more content with life's situations. They key is this: My situations probably won't change. Either I can make myself and everyone around me miserable or I can just enjoy life and love what I have. I hope you can do the same.

Tharp

Here is a pic that reminds me life is much easier than it could be: